Here is a story I wrote when I was in 9th Grade:
Fred Instead
There once was an alien named Kachoo who lived on Jupiter with his family. He was a tall, green lizard-like alien with deer antlers, a raccoon tail, and snake scales. His planet is much different than ours. On their planet they only eat limburger cheese and sardines, they don't have as much technology, and they have different ways of talking. For example, Kachoo talks in a robot-sounding voice. But he also has a device that lets him speak English. The planet has mixed seasons which means that it snows in the summer and is warm in the winter.
One day in the year 2014, he was driving his spaceship goofing around when he crashlanded on some blue and green planet. He fell straight into the yard of a family who lives in the country. He had never seen this planet before and didn't know where he was. He was a little confused by all of his surroundings. He saw snowballs in the sky and giant tree-like monsters. Then he saw a cute red beagle. He hadn't seen one of these creatures before and didn't know what to think of it. As soon as he heard it bark he thought that maybe it was the most intelligent creature on the planet. Until the dog chased him and tried to play with him. The dog messed around with every creature he ran into (he even had a bad incident with a snapping turtle that he doesn't want to think about).
Kachoo walked into the house and saw a redheaded 15-year-old boy named Matt talking to his parents. He walked up to Matt and introduced himself. At first Matt questioned whether he was a real alien or just a guy trying to prank him.
To prove his existence he said, "Excuse me while I whip out my laser gun,". At first, Matt was disgusted by his response.
"No, I mean this thing," he said as he pulled out a futuristic space laser. He then proceeded to shoot the family cat with it. Matt was in for a shock because he thought he had killed the cat. Then he apologized and shot the other cat. He yelled at the alien and told him to never kill any of their pets again.
"I didn't kill them, they're just sent to another dimension." said the alien. For some reason that didn't make Matt feel any better.
Matt asked the alien what his name was.
"Kachoo," he replied.
"God bless you," Matt said.
"No, my name is Kachoo," he replied back.
"Maybe I should just call you Fred, instead," Matt said.
Matt showed him around the house. He had never seen a human home before and wasn't really sure where he was. That night they had dinner together. "What are these weird yellow things?" asked the alien. Matt explained to him that those things are called bananas.
"Are they edible?" asked the alien. Matt told him that pretty much everything at the dinner table was edible.
"Okay" the alien said happily and then ate the fork.
"What are you doing? That is NOT food!" Matt said, shocked.
That night Matt showed Fred a movie about Earth. The movie he showed was the third Austin Powers movie. He wanted Fred to understand about the traditions, culture, and humor of planet Earth.
"What did you think about that movie?" asked Matt
"That humans somehow find their body parts hilarious," said a confused-looking Fred.
The next day they went to the library and introduced Fred to reading. He saw a bunch of people everywhere and realized this planet is much more populated than he thought.
At the library a kid walked up to him and asked, "Hi scaly green creature, what's your name?"
"My name is Fred Instead," he replied.
Then he picked up a book and tried to throw it. Matt told him that books are for reading and not throwing. So Matt sat there for hours until he taught Fred how to read. Fred was so happy because he was never able to do anything like that on his home planet.
"What exactly do you do on your home planet?" asked Matt.
"We don't have TVs or computers or books or any of that so we just play games" said Fred Instead.
"What kind of games?" asked Matt.
So Matt and Fred went to the park and played an alien sport called Octoball where they kicked around an octopus as if it were a ball. Fred always keeps an octopus in his pocket when he travels. The game is one of the most popular sports in the galaxy and Matt and Fred had so much fun. After the game, Fred started missing his family. He asked Matt if he could help him find his way home.
"Sure, I'll help you find your spaceship. Where did you last leave it? asked Matt.
"I'm pretty sure I left it right in the middle of your yard," said Fred.
When they got to Matt's yard Fred realized that he had the compact spaceship in his pocket the whole time. It was about the size of a nickel. He pulled it out of his other pocket and hit a button and it inflated. Fred jumped in the spaceship and after Matt and Fred Instead said good-bye to each other, Fred left. Then after a few seconds, Matt realized one of his chickens was missing.
"Oh, I forget to mention this but I'm thinking about marrying one of your chickens," the alien yelled back down to Earth. Matt was a little bit mad because the family raised chickens for eggs. He chased Fred's spaceship but it flew off too fast for him to see. Back at his home planet, a huge chicken wedding was held. At the wedding, a bunch of other aliens came and everybody had a great time. His best man was Gonzo from the Muppet Show who traveled to Jupiter after filming a new Muppet movie. Marvin the Martian, Yoda, Stitch, ALF, and many other famous aliens were there was well. They ate a limburger cheese cake with sardines and eggs on top. They all lived happily ever after. Especially Fred because now he gets a bunch of eggs for free.
No comments:
Post a Comment